-I wonder what i might have turned out to be if i never crossed that street that one day in october 1986, i wonder where i might have been if i never started to talk to my ex that summer dau 1999...
All roads leads to something. I wonder where my road had been leading me? Maybe somewhere where i would never have hurted my baby, maybe she would have been happyer now if she dident know me at all, who knows.
Maybe i can never restore the happyness in her, maybe i never can reach to her anymore, but you have to understand that not be belived in 6 months by the only one you beg for to belive you, that is so frustrating and anger creating, so one day the glass was full, and i did something i do regret.
We can all snow us in that what i did or what she did, but what is the most important, that i am here and willing to forgive her for all her flaws, and move on with her. Or we can discuss this over and over and dont come anywhere...
Bitterness is a blindness it makes us blind from the truth, its a sin from satan him self.
Only we can remove that, if we want.
I am not proud over much in my life, but i am damn proud over my baby.
Sure things could be diffrent, me here she there and we still had our arguments, instead of how its now, me here she there me loving her to death never want any fights or arguments, just to give love...
Yea things could really be diffrent.
Maybe she do can find a better guy out there, iknow that there is, but will she ever find a guy whos willing to die for her, put her in first room in everything, listen to her understand her, be romantic to her, give her time to be her self and love her for that, love her flaws and mistakes as much as her heart...
Sure try find a guy whos all that at same time...
I am that guy, i am diffrent, very honest and never tell a lie to her... I am not perfect, i am not an angel, but sure as hell iknow how to love her in her way.
If my love aint strong enough to repair the damage i cost, then help me god please.
I give time to heale, but i let her heale in knowlidge that i am always here and catch her when she falls.
If 2 people love each other, should them go separate ways? For what, why? Becouse they both hurted each other as bad once? If both are the sinners in a relationship, but still loves each other, then there is a way to be healed and restored.
I am not restored, i am still hurt becouse i am not still belived by her, but did i leave again? No i dident, becouse i really meen that now, i really do want this forever. people can grow inside of them, atleast i can coz i try to learn from my mistakes... That is important to learn from our mistakes thats how we gow stronger and develoap us from stupid to ok....
I can sit here and throw away alot moral cookies for you all, but im tired of that now, i have said the most inkow bout love and life here... I dont know how much more there is for me to say...
All iknow atleast is that i never spoke a single lie here, neither did i to my baby, so where that doubting of her to me came from i dont know. But i came back ey? And that was my purpose to come back again, just read my blog: when the sky is purple-red i will be standing next to you and smile again......
I aint no smarty, no i aint i just wanna be taken for my word of honour and be belived so i can get my fucking rest in my damn grave someday... Life is too short to throw away to the pigs, let her know what you feel for her and let her make the decission if she wants you or not.
I told her what i want, she told me, so what the fuck are we wating for? Maybe we aint wating for anything, but sure as hell aslong the status of relationship is on single, then you must be wating on something... Maybe better times, maybe a better guy to come to her, maybe nothing, maybe baby.......
I am wating on one single thing, and its to die happy, without her i am not happy...
Im here for her always, she wants me well stop laughing at me and get this relation on going and change tht fucking status to what i sent you: IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.
This is the last letter in what happend me the past week, and i will return to my blogs blueprint again and mix my truth with feelings wich are shaken to some lyrics from some songs.
Hope you who reads this dont doubt me and hopefully you understand that im just a human who can do mistakes. Im not perfect never will be, but i meen when i say that i am here for you baby and im staying for good, wanna try something beautiful? Then try and stay with me and you shall know i ment every letter in staying for good.
We all know how to make us happy, and my babylove is the one i can only be happy with.
My name is Michael, and now you know who i am, a simple guy who headed against the stars and fell of somewhere in the middle....
Thank you for have been reading my misery. Back to basic again MR HELLBOY
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