Song of lovely trees of fall

Life aint what its expected to be.

The white horse never comes, only descises in every corner of the dissepointments.

See you fly would have made my day, see you love me would have done it all, but only what i see is you, you who are afraid to let go.

World is no beautiful place to be in, but you are a beautiful place to love.

First time i saw you, i did not know you, time made me love you, i never choosed.

Dissepointments all over us, we think, live the same way, why couldent we love the same way?

Love comes once in a while, knocks on your door, throus you a smile, but if you never heare the door knock, how can you fall in love then?

August leafes fall on a sunny day, on your cheek, on your shoulders, blinded by sun, blinded by hate, blinded by love. You still choose.

I made my choise, you.

This is a song for broken hearts, this is my very true own story, for fue its a song, for me a reality that i try to live in, i still love you.

Love speaks to your soul, to your heart, what you dont know, its the truth, what you know of usually is the fals way of beliving. Or sometimes you hit the lottery....

Leafes of fallen trees, fall upon the ground, messing up, making children play among yellow-red nature paper.

God chooses life to us, God belives in us. I belive in you.

Watching, carying, protecting, my song to you love, is a poem where i belive in us.

Daybreake and a living cold

Daybreake came, i saw the light.

Light that blinded me, blinded by love.

Snowstorm blew in thrue that door to the right of the left in the middle of the wall, beside that window that are to the next of my door, that was closed, but not the door.

I saw the light come freezing in, couse of the snowstorm. Dam snow that made my day a living hell, a hell that got my car outside say brrr.

Snowstorm has its own, very own way to say, I love you, it hits right thrue your vaines.

My way is to warm you..

Tuesday, and sun is not yet up, i wonder when James brings in her and the sun, JAMES!!!!!!!

New York, New York here i come, almost, money problem...

Daybreake came, in came snowstorm, in came the day, but not she....

I opend the window, that stood shut, and i waited.... For her......

Not yet, not yet

I held your hand, i saw you fall asleep for one last time...

I wiped your tears one more time, i held you in my arms, now you are far from me, where i no longer can see you smile...

We cryed, we played, i held you when you fell and cryed, i wiped your tears for then to see you smile, but now i hold you for one last time.

You lie in my arms , tears of mine falls down upon your beautiful innocent face.

You dont no longer look at me, you closed your eyes, for good.

Not yet, please, not yet my sweet child, not yet...

Stay for a moment with me, stay a life time.

No more laugh, no more smiles, no more of what was one time we.

:`(

I love you my sweet child, my darling, angels upon us will keep you safe...

High healed sneakers and love poems

I look at you, everyday. You belong with me.

I see trees flowering, leafes growing from naked body, you belong to me.

Shoes, clothes, make up, you all weare that, i still see whats beneath that, you belong to me.

Prawns, dates, dances, everything i been with you, still i never smelled your hair in real life, iknow you smell like a flower on a rainy day after suns heatening light streams against its body.

Your eyes melt me, your voice, it made me go out on a tuesday night and tell a secret to my own identity, it said you belong to me.

Ive been here all the time, cant you see me? You belong with me.

We walk together, was it a dream, let me dream, was it not a dream, never let me fall asleep.

High heals, sneakers dont matter, you look georgous in any time, weather, wind, I love you.

You smiled that sunny night, you smiled that dark day, stil im not sure if it was night or day, couse you sweaped me away with your smile, i knew then.... you belong with me....

Winter fruit

Sweet plums picken, sweet love taken.

darlings of god truth, darlings of waterproof silence.

Dawns of dust, lighten by thunder.

Drums we need, guitars we speak.

I speak with clean tung, you speak with black one.

I live my life thrue the drums of truth, play the guitar of broken souls.

Music rings in my ears, the solo i played rings in my head.

Snowstorm, warm weather, sun is not yet up.

Love comes love goes, when do i know it stays?

Guessing, lurking, working with my grey little ones.

Right, wrong, gues what, i dont know anything.

Life death eternity, they all seems to be an eternity of hoping.

Its winter now, and im still not warm...

Hello world

There where the world stops, we meet, there where angels in the yard have their cup of the meet, there we shall unite one day.

Hello my love, where have you been, where have you rested?

Im cold as steel, warm as a heating boil.

Grapes, bananas, apples, picked from garden of innocent, pick one for me.

Little girl, little boy, hello world, do me a favour, tell that queen to come to me, she dont heare me, not even with my Dior or Armani on me.

Hello world...

I dont know you, still i meet you everyday in my world, you walk like a queen, live like a queen beyond my world, beyond my imagination. My imagination is like chocolate in a little girls face, its a dream come true.

Hello world, good to see you my old friend.

My love is a mountain, but that you know, i am like a solid rock, that you also know...

Hello world, angel of harlem, what do you dont know bout me? Talk to god, he is there, be with me, couse i am also here.

I waited long now, i waited day and night, maybe i did something wrong, maybe i aint good enough, hello world, i know you are in my world thrue pain thrue greaatness and fire.

I belive, i do. In you, in God in my children, but, i love you more each day that goes by.

Hello world, send me a gift, send my queen, i love you so.

Im tired, let me love you, only you, no one else...

To my love of my life

Much you do for my heart, much you did before you knew me.

Many times i wondered, if its you and me, what i know now, would i known that then, i would had captured your heart long time ago.

"Couse love comes once in a while, knocks on your door, throws you a smile"

If i could turn back time, i would have met you earlier, and even then i would have acted as i do today, say ilove you give you the world...

Oh baby, i would give you the world, give you the stars, give you everything... Give you the ring on your finger.

Everyday you come sweeping in throu that door, everyday you smile.

I miss you so it hurts, i miss you everyday.

Teardrop on my cheek, teardrop for every minute i miss you, every time i think of you.

Love comes only once in a while, throws you a smile. You smiled, and i know i love you.

First time i saw you, i knew you were beautiful, i remember my first word to you, when we went friends: "You are beautiful" You thanked...

If i knew then what i know now, i would fall in love then.

My love of my life, you are so much for me, my best friend, my saviour, my love that bleeds in my heart, i do love you.

Its not easy to say "I love you" but for you it is, couse i do love you.

From my flat hand a star rises above to the heaven, before it rised, i gave a thought and planted it in that star, that was long time ago on a early fall on -90`s, if i knew then what i know now, i would have followed that star.

Star found me now, and brought me an angel, you.

Im in love, i lay my self on my couch, fall in sleep everynight, with you in my mind.

Everyday i smile to you, everyday i whisper your name.

Love only comes once in a while, it came, i found my home. Im never again taking a roadtripp to sunny beach, couse in sunny beach i found home, at your place, in your heart and soul.

I can only wish, wish you hold my hand. Hold me at nights, im holding you.

Once in a while, love comes thrue that door, only once, i dont fail with you.

I love you so, my love of my life.....

The first time that I saw you
Looking like you did
We were young, we were restless
Just two clueless kids
But if I knew then what I know now
Id fall in love

On a bus in Chicago
Three rows to the left
You know my heart was racing for you
But we never even met
But if I knew then what I know now
Id fall in love

Chorus
Cause love only comes once in awhile
Knocks on your door and throws you a smile
And takes every breath, leaves every scar
Speaks to your soul and sings to your heart
And if I knew then what I know now
Id fall in love

On a summer night in August
In the back seat of my car
Instead of trying to get to know you
I took it way too far
But if I knew then what I know now
Id fall in love

Repeat Chorus

Oh I used up a lot of chances
I cant get them back
But if again it comes calling
Im gonna make it last

Repeat Chorus

Oh if I knew then what I know now
Id fall in love

Rollercoasters of love and joy

Rollercoaster called life, lurking over your shoulder. Watching, teaching, learning, from you.

If only you would see me, see me with my eyes. Never defeat me, never leave me.

If only you...

Look at me, tell me the sad story, look at me, involve me with the truth.

If only you...

Speak up, speak the truth, never hide the part where the prince in cinderella died.

Dont fool me, never, fool with me allways.

If only you...

I guess its ok to say im sorry, i guess its ok to say I love you.

I guess im hurt, i guess im ok. Hurt, not by you, ok thats by you.

Listen to me, before you go, look at me, not thrue the window from the train.

If only you would see me thrue my eyes.

If only you....

Mr fade away

I was in the hospital today, from like 16:00 till 23:00.

Thought it was the heart, i got chest pains and my heart stopped pumping like 1 second and replaced that second with one small hit on it. when i came in to hospital, i sat down and faded suddenly away, bearley knew what my name was. Then i fell asleep and woke up, fell asleep and woke up.

Doctor said it was the stress that made all this shit, so ive been stressing alot, yes i have. Theese pains i have had many years, only that its begun to hurt moore theese days.

When i came home, i was bleeding nose blood, and i never bleed from the nose, i did it once when i was like 14 years old, then i bleeded alot, tonight my hand was all red, thats how i new i was bleeding like hell from my nose.

So this was my day, how was yours?

When you got a good thing...

Fuck... Fuck... Fuck, i hate night time, i hate getting all mushy (sensitive).

Its like an emptyness that eats your soul and heart. Feeling that you need some one who meens the world for you, near you. It can easily be winkled as an egoistic needing, but as matter of fact, it is no fucking ego tripp to the sunny beach. Its a feeling that if that one would be with you now, you would give back to her as in my case, so much moore than you expect to have, you, in this case me, dont expect nothing at all, only that you, still me in this case, need to GIVE my love.

I am like a can full of feelings, full of love wich just needs to be emptyed, couse it needs to be filled again very fast.

Imagine that this "can" is filled up, and not emptyed, all the love that needs to go inside the can when the can is emptyed, is lying besides on the table, and the table gets filled by love, then we have a situation that is unbearable for your heart. My heart is this can, and when the table fills up, the feelings are attacking other parts of your soul, like disorientation, unfocusing, sadness, suddenly you think that you are non wanted.

But in that moment its very important to be very specific to your self and think with your heart, couse there all the answers lyes. Brain mix things up on its own, not heart, its always telling the truth.

So in my case this night, my "table" is filling up, and the can is still full.

When i meen "empty the can", then i meen that you need to speak out your love for whom,

Calm down, take it easy, yeah, but my train goes 525mph on the highway, and it will never stop.

Should i calm down? Well the fear is that if i calm down, slowing the train, maybe my target of love will find that a withdraw, and people who seas me calm down, thinks often that i given up.

I will never give up, im a stubborn bastard who does not deserve to live on this planet of apes.

Nooo i will never fail with her, no never. The day i fail, im done, i kill my self. I hate failing.

Feeling that you can wait a life time on someone, is happenning now, couse how matter i try seing things out of diffrent angle, i allways come to the same point, i can not measure others against her, there is no human who walks upon this earth that has the qualifications that she has.

She blinded me totally with love, blinded me but still i see, aah shit, its hard to explaine, simplest way of expalining it is: you see other women that looks good, but you still think, " shes not moore beautiful than my sweet temptation" and you keep doing what you did before. There isnt anyone who are moore perfect, beautiful, sexyer, better, nicer, sweeter than her.

there is a song that could have been written by me, its Lady Antebellums: when you got a good thing...

The words are: You know you keep bringing out the best of me, and i need you now even moore than the air im breathing...

Well the whole song is so perfect matched words from my heart against my sweet lullabye.

But im still wondering why night time must be so hard, why i everytime must be so fucking mushy? i think this blog is all about her, look at allmost every posting, its her in it all along...

Well this love train, i hope it never ends, couse its dam nice to be inlove, but still its a hard road to travell, but as long as shes there and speaks with me, and no other victims are near that i must draw my sword against for a fight, thats good, i dont think i have the power to fight a girl, she has her own mind, own heart, own will, if i fail and slippng down to reserve place, i dont fuck up her happyness, but im not either second price, put out my fire once, its never glowing like it did before.

Im the guy you have one shoot, one chance with, take it and you have me forever, blow it, you loose me forever, the magic, the words, everything, its not my job to give those words when you have some one else, i can advise you, give you pointing direction in life, but i will not show my heart. Hard dealer, yes. Im not a toy to have fun with and then ditsch, fuck that.

When i give my heart, you will see it forever if you choose to accept it.

Dont accept if you are not sure if i can be the life long one.

Are you sure that i am, but you aint ready yet, well i have only one message to you, and that is simply: I will wait as long as it takes for you to be ready, but be with me, and only with me the whole time and you have me ready when you are ready. I dont have hurry anywhere, couse iknow we will be ONE, one day. United.

This girl whom my tung speaks about, she gives me so much, she lightens me up. Oh dam sure she will be my wife one day, if she wants. I could give the whole world and much moore to her.

When do you know its love? Its when you sacrifise your own needs and your self for another one, take a bullet, put her in first place before you and others, think, eat, drink, sleep her.

Then its love on elite level.

Back to this heart aching thing again, why the hell do it have to be so heavy to breath when you miss someone so much, fuck.

The word "I love you" aint no moore strong enough to say, i must find stronger words, i must meassure up my love to right weigh, just to show exact how deep this heart-feeling-love thing is.

I know that im allways here for her, im never leaving her, never hurting her, fuck no, never. If i would see, hear or notice that someone did touch a hairstraw from her beautiful soul, i WILL rip that soul apart, give CPR and kill him again. I WILL tear him apart with my own bear hands. No one touches my girl, no one touches that one i love, no never. I might be small, i might not be strong, but when it sais "snap" in my head, i dont use 36% of my strength as human otherwise does, i use 100%, then you dont know what you do any moore when it hits 100%.

I can not change my self, and will not either, i come in a packages that has bad jokes, ups and downs and lots of swearing words that aint of gods grace, BUT you will get HELL LOT of love life long.

Here im sitting in the middle of the night, typing to a blog no one reads, its as lone as i am, but still im here and typing. Sad story this mike is, mmm yeah, but that girl, i love her moore than life it self, she gives me so many smiles, so many mmmmmmmmm so much that makes flowers grow on cold day in syberia without soil to feed it with.

Im worrying for nothing, but that is how i work, i allways worrie too much, its how my love works. I want to talk 24/7 with her, never hang up the phone, cheeezzz what a bill haha, skype, oh no my god that shit, iknow it should work, hey honey, we must get you a laptop so we can fix this skype problem.

Life is fucked up, its hurting every fucking minute, but when she turns up, oh shit life can be so wonderful.

I think this posting will be long, yeah im not finnished yet mother fucker, ive got still pretty much im gonna spit out here in your face mmmhm.

"Hold on tight, dont let go2, yeah never let go.

I dont think there is any one who can love you like me, or moore than me, think about it. Could you live with some one who are "ordinary standars man" nice and cozy, never hits you, brings flowers on your birthday and special days, and the other days goes to work, talks to you, and nothing moore?

That thing between all that guy is, i am, i can pop up with gifts wich day ever, or give you flowers just couse you are you and you are so beautiful. One morning you find a note next to you when you wake up: I love you honeywith all my heart, i wish you gods grace to day and dont forgett my love, i love you so much... See you tonight ;)

Yeah thats me, i cry, i bleed of love, but i can still kick your as, not yours honey.

Fuck fuck fuck, i can not sleep, i miss her so terrible much, it hurts oh yes. Hurts in good way.

Why does that girl have to be so beautiful, nice, sexy, hot, good looking, beautiful times million, cute, sweet....? Thank you god for all that....

I dont know anything moore than that i love her very deeply in my heart, i want her to have that freedom a girl should have, shell find it with me, that im proud over, that i can give her that, equality as the name goes under.

Be with me my love, and you will get that life you want.

Im proud of you, you are so clever.

With all my heart, soul, body and mind... I love you so deeply, selflessly, and with a burning heat from my heart.

im allways here for you my love, allways....

I love you.

//Michael