Truth will set us free

Train waits, and im standing still here on the ground, waving and smiling.

Time couldent stand more silent then now this very true minute.

I never made any promisses that i broke, or did i?

With the bag filled with fue clothes and some other stuff, i now leave with the train that waiting.

I remember the memories we shared, i remember the yesterday.

When i head of with the train, and land with my feets again on the solid ground, i will no longer look back, becouse the "back" is filled with blank memories that hurts more then the cancer sick patient that wished her the death.

The train will stand in the fields where i will slowly float on, fields of golden harvest.

Finger tops touching the edges of the golden harvest. Sky purple red, grass green, smooth, wonderful straws.

Silence is a fact, its all as i once dreamed of, i can finally breath the air that i once wished to be baptised in.

No more pain, no more lies...

Horses running wild on open fields smiling with their eyes, birds in the sky flying free.

Water cold and fresh, taste of a free soul that was filled by Gods grace.

At last i can finally be free, smile with the longest smile that reaches my heart.

I can finally be me...

When the morning comes, i will wake up and know im home, home in the land of fields that i always belonged in.

Sky purplke red, grass greener then green, river blue and glittering silver, i now lye here and smile without no pains.....im home...

Now i am free...........................

Blue-red dreams

A spoon full of shrims, a teaspoon with love.

Gaze awhile in the sea world.

Stay a mong the river that caressed your skin that warm summer day.

Wind breeze from west touched gently the cheek of yours.

Fields of smooth grass and smile that went from north to south.

Share your memories that dont hurt, but would have hurted yesterday whenb you shared your ground with your mother who gave you birth.

Now we give our selves birth, here among the green grass fields.

Neverland never looked so beautiful before, until you shared your smile...

Fishes in the sea and the horses that runs wild on the fields, they all smile.

Share the age that dont matter to us, share the truth that dont have a lie in its self as an ingredience.

Pain we shared among our birth planet, now lies in shadows.

Flashback of a woman we remembered before is now a forgotten story.

Neverland... neverland... someday my friend of fields i lye in your arms of smooth grass and you caress my love, then im home.

If i fall, you catch me with the leafes of the trees.

Im tired of technology, im tired of sleeping with burdens on my shoulders that was all a lie to my soul.

Im tired of being the one that was born from a dirty gate....

Im tired of being promissed things at, im tired of being the one that never got the chanse to smell the stars...

Time after time, they never told me the ending of a beginning that was promissed to me.

Summer looked so beautiful, winters snoiw lyed on the ground glittering in blue red colours. The air was silent.

But still i lye here among the pain of what once were a relife.

Mirror of fallen revenge, and ashamed tears

I dont see no body else, you were my only friend, then understand who i am...

Everything happend on the life line.

They told me that they can, understand the man i am...

My past, damn, i feel like my dad.

I see my mum change me, message me that im no good in her life...

They told me that i can understand them, but not me.

Mirror on the wall tell me who i am, you were my only friend then please understand me who i am, talk to me Mr in the mirror...

Look at me when i am talking to you, feel my pain in my pride, feel my wounds.

My past is bleeding in me, smells like a rotten body burning.

I rised and i fell, back from the ashes, still i scole why...

Here we are again, questions that only you can solve, but you aint nothing more then a ghost from my past that never answered me who i am.

Baptised in a shape of satan, rised with wings that i sometimes think that they are broken, look at me when i am delivering my feelings to you.

Why you dont care, why you say you care? You were my only one i trusted.

But you no talk to me...

I see no body then my own guilt.

Scars that the wall of shame gave me, rise and fall i will still be the man you dont understand.

I can see my past, damn, i am my fucking dad, i saw my mum smile at me and bless me, but it was somebody else behind me.

Tears i shaded to the ground had no value, but maybe for god.

He still havent called me.

Understand the man i am, please...

It looks like i did take them all this time, only for this time.

I did take them all baby, i sure did......

Dont fail me, please see my blood in my eyes, and the pain in my pride.

Mirror in my eyes, dont fail me, be my only friend, not the one that left me you know he who was on the wall in the mirror.

I stand today with my guilt to life and shame infront of the mirror on the wall, i see no man, i see no one.

They all left me...

I look like my fucking dad, my fucking dad.

I am, him..... i am him....

Thrue my rise and fall, understand me who i am....

..... baby... it looks like i took them all this time.... sure i did.....

.............

Fields of memories

Do you remember me under a jealous sky?

Among the fields she fell in sleep in his arms; will you stay with me for just a little while?

I never made promisses even that there is some that i broke...

Will you walk with me in the fields when the day comes?

Will you take my hand and lead me thrue the darkness?

For thou in your arms, i will walk in fields of gold.

Will you remember me when you look at the sky and remember the jealousy that the clouds brought, will you be there when you watch the stars alone, be there with me?

Do you remember me when the sky gazed against the stars, when the soft whisper of gods voice to your ear.

Will you remember me...

Among the fields of gold among the clouds of barley i will sit with you and watch the stars...

Will you remember me among the fields of gold...

Pure love

Iknow we havent met, iknow we cant save our selfes with words, we need tears to wet our hands with from each other to save us.

Everyday that sun sets by, is a world of fear and hate and.... love....

But one day you come back to me, you came once in a dream, then you left one day from my dreams and left me out in the rain for years...

Whats ment to be is ment to be....

You came back one winter night, please dont tell me you came to say good bye...

You stayed for a whole nother year everyday...

One year now, are you going to say good bye, i wish not, im afraid...

This is pure love....

You came one night when i was in sleep, you said hi enough times so i could fall in love to you, but you left me standing in the rain all alone and crying and wondering where you went...

Maybe you went for a drink...

So long ago...

One year you stayed, please no goodbyes....

Your eyes captured me, still does.

Your voice woved a dream again, a dream where you gave me pure love.

I saw you thrue a screen, but isnt it that way we do it theese days?

This was ment to be, i thought, what did you think?

This is pure love...

I held you in my arms, but you werent there, i cryed.

You sat next to me in my car, but when i looked at your beautiful dark eyes, you dissepeared, i smiled but when i looked at you i shade a tear, of sadness.... My smile died that early morning as god took a soul from a human.

You have been with me so many times in my car bnext to me singing with your beautiful voice i was happy when i focused on the road i smiled, but there was no eyes that sang to me...

Im lost without you...

Still today you sing to me everyday, becouse its you who i am waiting for, even if you die i am still waiting for my dream to walk out of my dream and hold me like god held a child new born to this world.

Im afraid with you, i am loved with you, i am safe with you.... afraid that you leave me, loved becouse you loved me many years ago one night.... i never forgot you... never...

This is pure love...

This is pure freightening...

Morning will come, and so will you, maybe this time not in my dreams...

I miss you, i love you..... for ever...

This was ment to be becouse it is pure love...

Pure from the heart....

Artificial world of flowery

See me heare me love me touch me...

Dream, live, cry...

Artificial longing after to be touched, a kiss made of noumbers and electronic pop that the neighbour spreaded out, fills us with tenderness that we only could dream outside that artificial world.

No hand to hold on to me, no arms that wraps my attraction...

See me heare me love me touch me, artificially wrong but very real beyond that enter button that sent me a heart.

I want you to see me, i want you to love me and touch, touch my soul touch my wings so they can fly.... Not artificially, but very truth fully right.

I am not from this place i am from beyond the ashes of love.

I met you in a artificial world, you became the life for me, i enter your wall of love to me with numbers and digits, still i dont see you heare you or touch you....

Broken words did us no good, we fixed them, we still live in an artificiall world....

Shes a prison i heard, shes sad i got it...

But she dont share that lonelyness by her own, i share it by watching from the otherside of the road waving my hand to her.

A broken soul fell apart, i stood by you held you in your arms, but did you see me, did you feel my tears fallin upon your cheek while you were lying there all alone and cold in your tears?

I held you that cold winter day... i held you....

Every tear i shaded is filled with fear if you leave me, i cry them for you, i cry in fear you leave me....

The ground i stand on dies more and more for every tear that wets the mudd on the ground that i was born from with gods breath to help.

Save me before i fall apart, save my broken heart.

Hold my soul, dont leave it... ever....

Listen to my heart, becouse it tells you a story as true as me. Its broken but beating after the one to love one day....

In this artificial world i loved you, in this real life i held you.....

The prototype that failed

-I will tell you a little story, and its up to you to belive if its a real or fake story. This "story" is more likely thoughts i have.

I belive in life, love and god. I belive that we share the same dreams but in diffrent shapes.

I belive that we all need something in our lifes, so it dont swallow us totally, the darkness in us.

I belive too in justice and the power to the people.

I belive in so much...

But even how much i belive in, all those aint much to joy for, if you dont see them in you.

How can a man be blind for something he belives in? Someone erased the belife in him.

This story is more likely a true feeling we all carry.

When you belive in love, then people might think something very diffrent then what you think of.

When you belive in life, then people might think something diffrent in that topic too...

So when people start building their storys round your belives, then it might end up to something nasty.

Americans say: If there aint no body then there aint no proof...

Is it so with the belife in people to your belife?

Just becouse you see something, does it justify the truth that it is that way? Or can you buy your self free with just the simple sentence: Its my belife, not yours...

How can i make you belive in what i tell you, if you aint willing to belive in that?

How can i be sure that you truly belive in what i say when you say: Ok i belive in you?

Answer: You can never be sure.

If we could read minds, then we would know the solid fact of the word i do belive you.

Dond judge a human, its not your area. Where goes the thin line between judging and not judging?

And what if i judged you? Does the world end here? Am i being punished now by God? No i am not being punished by God, but maybe you who over reacted on that i judged you, but instead i never judged you, i only spoke something that you dident understand and you thought i ment something bad bout you, so automatickly you took that judghing thing as a self mechanism for protecting what is yours -YOU!

I dont think we can say much bout someone before it sounds judgingly bad.

I dont think we can breath this air without getting cought for inhaling the air.

We aint more then humans, we fail, we rise, we fall, but still next day we stand infront of that mirror at home of our childhood home and masturbate to us selfes while we watch in the mirror and pretend that we are Elvis in Graceland.

So what ever i am pointing at, i just wanna say that what ever we belive in, that IS our belife, not your friendly neighbours whos standing next to you.

So thats the story, pretty amazingkly hard to understand and get huh?

-I was thinking bout other stuff too, well more likely many stuff, my head spinns round and creates one thing after another, and its allmost all stupidety stuff.

Lately i have been thinking very much of my self, that i am pretty ugly, nothing worth and etc...

When people disagree with me i persume they lie, i cant be sure if they lie or not, i only know that it feels like that.

I hate when people say something nice bout my look or me becouse i allways heard nice stuff bout me that iknew later they only said to me becouse they wanted to be nice to me.

I hate to shower, becouse i was forced in the shower when i was a kid.

I hate to cut my hair becouse i was forced to cut it when i was a kid.

I think that i was just a prototype to a failed version of "a perfect boy"

Mother created me, programmed me, hit the autopilot when she thought that her prototype was finished, and then took and leaned back in her sofa and smoked a cigarr and drank her brandy in the ray of light... Suddenly her creation, her prototype started to go awfully wrong in his system, the screen screamed "ERROR SYSTEM FAILIER" she tryed to save the program, but what to do she couldent do that, so she abandoned the prototype and turned her back to it.

And ever since that day the prototype walked the earth and was on autopilot...

How can a programmed prototype manage to push that button to manuell stiring by its own? I still wonder, becouse i am still on autopilot still today.

-I wondering, is there anything i do that is good enough? Am i enough to feed the world with my presens? Or am i only one little seed in the wind that is blown from the fields in Alabama to southwest Africa without being seen?

Everybody likes to be seen once in a while, some wants it badly more then others, but somewhere we all wanna be seen once and a while, even me.

I feel that people wanna own me, they say i dont own you do what you like... So when i do what i like, its not approoved without alot questions that has a negative sound in it.

I am not for sale, not now not ever, its a fact that has been approoved by me since anno 1978...

Enough of this shit, im just tired of being me being this prototype that failed and walks on autopilot, HEY MIKE MIND THE GAP... oops there he fell.......

Anyway all i wanna say is that im back on this blog again and hellboy just rised from its grave.

Im coming to you now and hell is coming with me, mark my word...

This is fue words from Mike "the prototype that failed"